A new year, a new begining...

New years day has always been nothing too special to me. It's just another day, another year, nothing special about it... Just means I'm another year older and another year doing exactly what I did the last year. This year is different, though. I feel like it's a chance for a new begining. I have a baby now, I'm living at my parents house again to save money and so Sydnie can have her loving grandparents close, my older sister is married now, and my little sister is living away from home to go to college. It seems like everyone's lives are going in so many different directions! I also feel like this is a chance for me to start over spiritually. I have gotten out of the routine of going to church on Sundays, and although I never felt that I was very spiritual before, or that I even knew anything about church or God, I feel like my life went seriously downhill. I read a book not too long ago that my dad gave me, "Blue Like Jazz" by Donald Miller. It really made me think about my life, and what has become of me. I want to be a better person, not just for myself, but for Sydnie. I want to be a good mom, and I want to change my life. This year is like an oportunity for me to do just that - change my life. After Sydnie wakes up in the mornings sometimes, I will go up to my dad's study and we will chat about the bible and things that I never quite understood about Christianity before. I think I would like to join some sort of a bible study group, but when I think about how little I know about the bible and about everything religious in general, I get nervous, and I don't want to make a fool of myself. Plus, I'm sometimes not good around people I don't know. Maybe I will just start to read the bible a little. My dad said a good place to start is Matthew. Maybe I'll do that. As for changes this year, I'm hoping that I can get a different position at work. Working night shift was tough before, and with a baby, it will only get worse. I am hoping to speak with my boss soon to ask him for a demotion so I will be able to go to a different shift. If he will allow me to do so, I will probably go strait to evening shift, since that's where they need dispatchers the most. But, if there is ever another opening on day shift, (6a-2p), I have highest seniority and would be next in line for that slot! That would be the best shift for me, other than m-f 8-5 of course, and for Sydnie! Anyway, we will see what happens! New year, new begining!!!